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mommy2-2



Joined: 24 Jun 2011
Posts: 234

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 4:20 pm    Post subject: Back in the game...maybe Reply with quote

Dh and I talked some more this morning at my prompting and neither of us can reach 100% yes or no. SO, since we both can't seem to make a decision either way (the typical logic screams NO, hearts whisper yes) about trying for a 3rd, we've come to a compromise, I think. (we'll see if it holds as it was my suggestion, but Dh said, "That sounds like a great idea").
Our decision for now is not to decide. Go figure! LOL
When he returns from deployment at the end of October, the new plan is to just go with the flow and not try to avoid a pregnancy, yet not try to get pregnant (that will be VERY hard for me to not count/date/pay attention to fertility signs, etc. but I'm going to try because I honestly don't know which outcome I'd want!) Let "nature take it's course" so to speak and it will happen if it's meant to be. In the meantime, I will be praying that God's will be done. We'll let it go that way from November till January (3 months). If by January we are not expecting a 3rd, he has agreed to consider a vasectomy and we'll just move forward and enjoy life fully with our 2. I am excited as it is the "closure" one way or another that I seem to be yearning for.
(couple of reasons on the time line. DS is a Dec. baby and I really had a hard time with a newborn in winter, I tend to get seasonal affective disorder, so October baby is my cutoff. Also, this will mean that any baby comes before DH turns 40 and I'd turn 38 the following Spring).
I haven't feel this much peace in a LONG time.

(My guess is this will change again many times before Oct. but for now, feels pretty darn good! LOL)
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kkimbrell



Joined: 11 Jun 2010
Posts: 192
Location: Snellville, GA

PostPosted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 7:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

that is awesome! I am so happy for you. It seems like you have both reached a place of compromise that you can live with and be happy about.
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walkbyfaith



Joined: 03 Aug 2009
Posts: 499

PostPosted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 8:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sounds like a plan! :)
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melicovas



Joined: 05 Nov 2007
Posts: 145
Location: Texas

PostPosted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

YAY.. sounds promising!
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mommy2-2



Joined: 24 Jun 2011
Posts: 234

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 12:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Middle of the night, kids are up...AGAIN, thinking, "#3? NO WAY IN HE$%"
Daytime comes, hugs, laughs...thinking, "#3, YES, GREAT! Let's just do it"
Mealtimes, bedtimes..."NOOOOOOO!"
Cleaning up after Dh AGAIN..."I ALREADY have 3 kids! No way!"
Kids in bed, house is quiet, "Aww...YES! NEED BABY SNUGGLES"

Is it JANUARY YET? Because I'm pretty sure whether we're pregnant or not by then, I'll free up several hours each day not having to THINK ABOUT IT ANYMORE!!!!! I am offically obsessed. Seriously, I can't seem to do a darn thing without thinking about it. (At the aquarium or Dr. appt or museum, grocery store, etc....thinking, "What would this be like with a 3rd?")

I think I need a lobotomy!
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walkbyfaith



Joined: 03 Aug 2009
Posts: 499

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 12:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

mommy2-2, if I can be so bold...I think you're not done. :) I have drawn my personal line in the sand SO many times for #4, and each time the line comes and goes I still obsess. So, sorry to say that when January rolls around, if you're not pregnant, you still won't be able to turn off your brain from thinking about it.

Unless you get that lobotomy. ;)

As far as some of your comments of wanting three or not, well, if two kids are acting up three won't make much difference. And two kids are being angels, well, add a third into the mix and your heart will absolutely run over with how sweet it is to see the three of them together. Spoken from experience. :)
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melicovas



Joined: 05 Nov 2007
Posts: 145
Location: Texas

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 4:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well said walkbyfaith! .. Totally agree on all points..there is no turning that #3 desire off. And also, yes, when 2 of the 3 are going nuts, doesnt really matter how many you have and to see the 3 of mine play together and moments of tenderness is awesome.

I , too, am in the mental debate pver a 4th.. except husband getting his'V' reversed to make it happen.. So guess not so much of a debate anymore.
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kkimbrell



Joined: 11 Jun 2010
Posts: 192
Location: Snellville, GA

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 6:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="mommy2-2"]Middle of the night, kids are up...AGAIN, thinking, "#3? NO WAY IN HE$%"
Daytime comes, hugs, laughs...thinking, "#3, YES, GREAT! Let's just do it"
Mealtimes, bedtimes..."NOOOOOOO!"
Cleaning up after Dh AGAIN..."I ALREADY have 3 kids! No way!"
Kids in bed, house is quiet, "Aww...YES! NEED BABY SNUGGLES"

[/quote]

this is so me too :)
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CAN'TDECIDE!



Joined: 16 Sep 2008
Posts: 968

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2011 7:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"there is no turning that #3 desire off"....so so SO SOOOOO true! While the rest of you ladies here are normal and sane, mostly....;-) I on the other hand am NOT! I mean geez..I think I have to be the only one on this board who is no where closer to a 3rd then when I first found this site! I mean at some point I SHOULD be able to turn that thought off, right? WRONG! The thought is STILL there...I wish it away, I distract myself..I exercise, buy cute clothes...I stand in front of the mirror and look at my in shape body and think...no freaking way "I" would ever want to damage THIS body.....I mean I am 39...all logic says count my blessings, move on and forget this whole subject of 3 EVER came up...then I am at work, I work in a store where many people have babies, kids plus I have to tend to all areas of the store and the baby/kids department. Talk about insanity and hormones during my ovulation, being aware of my ever increasing older age..ugh and then being smack in the middle of little shoes, baby and kid stuff and oh my gosh...my brain begins to go wild. Right now, a lobotomy may be my ONLY hope of ending this stupid ride I have been on since my youngest was a baby....I mean geez...he will be 13 in 2 months....what the heck!!!!

At least ya'll have an excuse for your thoughts...I should be SOOOOO over it already! But though I am so close to saying DONE...10% of me still is thinking about it...still! LOL
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Mama Erin



Joined: 09 Jan 2010
Posts: 89

PostPosted: Thu Aug 11, 2011 4:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

We called the scenario you're describing "two kid days" and "three kid days". That obsession is exhausting, I've been there. Actually, it's more work to obsess about 3 than to actually have 3. Almost. Well, not really, but at least I'm at peace knowing that my family is complete. Tired. But, at peace!
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RockyMtnMom



Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Posts: 391

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 3:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah! I'm so glad to hear you say you are both reconsidering! I could tell from your posts that you seem to really want another child. I think everyone goes through those "two kid days" vs. "three kid days." I actually tracked them on my calendar one month to see what I was feeling the majority of the time. I KNOW....totally ridiculous right? Clearly, the "three kid days" outweighed the "two kid days" for us. We couldn't be happier. Now, if I were just younger, I think I would seriously consider just one more!
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Mama Erin



Joined: 09 Jan 2010
Posts: 89

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 4:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

RockyMtnMom- you're crazy!!! You don't feel done? I am sooooo done. I wouldn't consider a 4th if I were 10 years younger ;). I'm glad to hear things are going well for you. Our babies are at the yummiest age!
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RockyMtnMom



Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Posts: 391

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 5:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mama Erin: Aren't they just perfect at this age, especially? My guy is so round and gushy I just can't get enough of him! He isn't crawling yet, so he's just all fun and none of the hassle yet ;-) I do think I am crazy to be even remotely considering another child. I sure wish I felt DONE, DONE, DONE. I'm sure we are, but I wish I REALLY felt it. I definitely feel full and like this is so perfect, in a way I didn't before having our third child, but can't help but think about ONE more. Oh well. I'm sure it'll pass and if it doesn't, I'll just have to figure out how to move on anyway! What part has made you feel so sure you are done? Maybe I need another perspective :-)

Hope all is well with you!
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mommy2-2



Joined: 24 Jun 2011
Posts: 234

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 12:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

STOP the round, gushy, precrawler baby talk! PLEASE! It's like holding a bottle of vodka in front of an alchoholic! Especially since Dh leaves tomorrow for Afghanistan again! Sigh.
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kkimbrell



Joined: 11 Jun 2010
Posts: 192
Location: Snellville, GA

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 6:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="mommy2-2"]STOP the round, gushy, precrawler baby talk! PLEASE! It's like holding a bottle of vodka in front of an alchoholic! Especially since Dh leaves tomorrow for Afghanistan again! Sigh.[/quote]

I can help that....my round gooshy cutie pie is teething and waking up every 45 min to 2 hours at night EVERY NIGHT!!

I'm going insane. but, he is very very cute in the daytime. :)
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